Thursday, January 06, 2005

BREAKING NEWS: KABBALAH CENTRE GOES MENTAL

This is the proof that the Kabbalah Centre has no grounding in sane reality: they're sending 10,000 bottles of special Kabbalah water to Indonesia to aid the survivors of the tsunamis.

The Center, which has been slammed for its superficiality by serious scholars, says the water not only quenches thirst but also comes with "centuries of wisdom in every drop."

Yeah, I'm sure that will help. I'm sure that some poor person who's lost his or her family, house, livelihood, etc., will be immensely calmed as they ingest the centuries of wisdom in Kabbalah water. Why not send some Kabbalah candles and red string bracelets while you're at it?

All this coming on the heels of Madonna and husband Guy Ritchie renewing their vows (in a Kabbalah ceremony) and "exchanging six-figure jewelry" really helps put things in perspective.

4 Comments:

At 2:44 PM, January 06, 2005, Blogger Andrea said...

Someone please make it stop. All of it. Madonna, McKabbalah... I want it to go away.

 
At 4:57 PM, January 06, 2005, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Sadly, this is a lucrative franchise that will not go away anytime soon. One of their (red) leaflets was thrust at me this morning in Grand Central Terminal. Just before tossing it, I noted that they're offering --I promise -- free "palm and face readings" at an event in New York City.

So there you have it: they've branched out from bottled water and bindels; the full array of snake oil is now available. Step forward and be healed, my children!

Daniel

 
At 5:08 PM, January 06, 2005, Blogger Esther Kustanowitz said...

Oh, I'll give them a palm and face reading....my palm...across their face...

[Editor's note: This post does not condone violence of any sort, even against string-bearing Jewishly inspired subcults.]

 
At 5:56 AM, January 07, 2005, Blogger Madonna said...

I wouldn't be giving them any ideas, Esther...

And speaking of our favorite Esther, Ms. Ritchie. After reading two biographies on her (research, you know), I'm convinced she has had some serious issues for a long time. Now the more I watch her in the last year or so, the more I'm convinced she has indeed lost it.

Well, what can I say? We're not in 1985 anymore, Toto...

 

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My Urban Kvetch: BREAKING NEWS: KABBALAH CENTRE GOES MENTAL

Thursday, January 06, 2005

BREAKING NEWS: KABBALAH CENTRE GOES MENTAL

This is the proof that the Kabbalah Centre has no grounding in sane reality: they're sending 10,000 bottles of special Kabbalah water to Indonesia to aid the survivors of the tsunamis.

The Center, which has been slammed for its superficiality by serious scholars, says the water not only quenches thirst but also comes with "centuries of wisdom in every drop."

Yeah, I'm sure that will help. I'm sure that some poor person who's lost his or her family, house, livelihood, etc., will be immensely calmed as they ingest the centuries of wisdom in Kabbalah water. Why not send some Kabbalah candles and red string bracelets while you're at it?

All this coming on the heels of Madonna and husband Guy Ritchie renewing their vows (in a Kabbalah ceremony) and "exchanging six-figure jewelry" really helps put things in perspective.

4 Comments:

At 2:44 PM, January 06, 2005, Blogger Andrea said...

Someone please make it stop. All of it. Madonna, McKabbalah... I want it to go away.

 
At 4:57 PM, January 06, 2005, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Sadly, this is a lucrative franchise that will not go away anytime soon. One of their (red) leaflets was thrust at me this morning in Grand Central Terminal. Just before tossing it, I noted that they're offering --I promise -- free "palm and face readings" at an event in New York City.

So there you have it: they've branched out from bottled water and bindels; the full array of snake oil is now available. Step forward and be healed, my children!

Daniel

 
At 5:08 PM, January 06, 2005, Blogger Esther Kustanowitz said...

Oh, I'll give them a palm and face reading....my palm...across their face...

[Editor's note: This post does not condone violence of any sort, even against string-bearing Jewishly inspired subcults.]

 
At 5:56 AM, January 07, 2005, Blogger Madonna said...

I wouldn't be giving them any ideas, Esther...

And speaking of our favorite Esther, Ms. Ritchie. After reading two biographies on her (research, you know), I'm convinced she has had some serious issues for a long time. Now the more I watch her in the last year or so, the more I'm convinced she has indeed lost it.

Well, what can I say? We're not in 1985 anymore, Toto...

 

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