Friday, September 03, 2004

THOUGHTS INSPIRED BY CNN'S COVERAGE OF THE RNC

I'm warning you, this is no political treatise. I don't do political here. Items are in no particular order of import. Because let's face it, none of this is important...just mildly amusing.

1. Herald Square was not as hard to get to as I thought. Went to Old Navy, took two different trains, and experienced no problems, roadblocks or pedestrian rerouting.
2. Gosh, I think Rudy Giuliani might make a good President. At this point, I like him better than either candidate. Can we elect him instead?
3. George Pataki doesn't look like a George to me. He looks like an Al. Or a Bob. But not a George. Plus, his last name rhymes with Iraqi. Very distracting.
4. Brilliant idea for a new TV show: presidential candidates live in a house together for the last two months before election day, and are forced to compete in standup comedy competitions, vocal contests, death-defying stunts and political discussions. Celebrity panel of judges should include Simon Cowell, Jay Mohr, Al Gore, and Joe Rogan. Special guest star Carson Kressly from Queer Eye will take the winner on a shopping spree and give them a total wardrobe makeover. We could call it "Last American Candidate Standing and Looking Fabulous." If neither candidate wins, Donald Trump becomes President.
5. Ralph Reed's a little hot. At least for a Bush adviser. Hmm. If not for that whole Christian Coalition thing, I think it might have worked out. Too bad.
6. What I've learned: Republicans think the Dems are wrong. And Dems think Republicans are wrong. Oh yeah, also, 9/11 happened. And it was bad.
7. Leann Womack sings "I Hope You Dance" to the GOP. My brother and sister-in-law sang the same song to my other brother and his bride at their wedding last August. Does that mean we're all Republicans now?

Clearly, the RNC has rocked my world. And I am undoubtedly only beginning to feel the aftershocks. The weeks ahead will surely also contain random thoughts inspired by the RNC, the DNC, the DMV, the SATC, the L.I.E., the Notorious B.I.G., the O.C., and other major cultural influences.

Stay tuned, the best may be yet to come.

6 Comments:

At 12:38 PM, September 03, 2004, Blogger Unknown said...

That was very very funny - I esp. dug the ending. You're so clever - damn!!

 
At 1:13 PM, September 03, 2004, Blogger PN said...

hysterical! i, too, was surprised at how close i was able to get to MSG. but i went to H&M on 34th and got a cute top. nothing like living in your own little bargain-hunting bubble.

 
At 2:21 AM, September 04, 2004, Blogger PetiteDov said...

Great post, i especially liked #4 - Carson was a beautiful touch.

 
At 12:19 PM, September 07, 2004, Blogger the fbg said...

Zell Miller in 2008, for the sake of giving the Republican Party a break. And then Giuliani in 2012 and maybe 2016. That's where I stand.
love from Moscow

 
At 12:18 PM, September 08, 2004, Blogger Erinna said...

In my dreams, I am as clever as Esther. :)

 
At 12:37 PM, September 13, 2004, Blogger Esther Kustanowitz said...

Aw shucks, folks.

 

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My Urban Kvetch: THOUGHTS INSPIRED BY CNN'S COVERAGE OF THE RNC

Friday, September 03, 2004

THOUGHTS INSPIRED BY CNN'S COVERAGE OF THE RNC

I'm warning you, this is no political treatise. I don't do political here. Items are in no particular order of import. Because let's face it, none of this is important...just mildly amusing.

1. Herald Square was not as hard to get to as I thought. Went to Old Navy, took two different trains, and experienced no problems, roadblocks or pedestrian rerouting.
2. Gosh, I think Rudy Giuliani might make a good President. At this point, I like him better than either candidate. Can we elect him instead?
3. George Pataki doesn't look like a George to me. He looks like an Al. Or a Bob. But not a George. Plus, his last name rhymes with Iraqi. Very distracting.
4. Brilliant idea for a new TV show: presidential candidates live in a house together for the last two months before election day, and are forced to compete in standup comedy competitions, vocal contests, death-defying stunts and political discussions. Celebrity panel of judges should include Simon Cowell, Jay Mohr, Al Gore, and Joe Rogan. Special guest star Carson Kressly from Queer Eye will take the winner on a shopping spree and give them a total wardrobe makeover. We could call it "Last American Candidate Standing and Looking Fabulous." If neither candidate wins, Donald Trump becomes President.
5. Ralph Reed's a little hot. At least for a Bush adviser. Hmm. If not for that whole Christian Coalition thing, I think it might have worked out. Too bad.
6. What I've learned: Republicans think the Dems are wrong. And Dems think Republicans are wrong. Oh yeah, also, 9/11 happened. And it was bad.
7. Leann Womack sings "I Hope You Dance" to the GOP. My brother and sister-in-law sang the same song to my other brother and his bride at their wedding last August. Does that mean we're all Republicans now?

Clearly, the RNC has rocked my world. And I am undoubtedly only beginning to feel the aftershocks. The weeks ahead will surely also contain random thoughts inspired by the RNC, the DNC, the DMV, the SATC, the L.I.E., the Notorious B.I.G., the O.C., and other major cultural influences.

Stay tuned, the best may be yet to come.

6 Comments:

At 12:38 PM, September 03, 2004, Blogger Unknown said...

That was very very funny - I esp. dug the ending. You're so clever - damn!!

 
At 1:13 PM, September 03, 2004, Blogger PN said...

hysterical! i, too, was surprised at how close i was able to get to MSG. but i went to H&M on 34th and got a cute top. nothing like living in your own little bargain-hunting bubble.

 
At 2:21 AM, September 04, 2004, Blogger PetiteDov said...

Great post, i especially liked #4 - Carson was a beautiful touch.

 
At 12:19 PM, September 07, 2004, Blogger the fbg said...

Zell Miller in 2008, for the sake of giving the Republican Party a break. And then Giuliani in 2012 and maybe 2016. That's where I stand.
love from Moscow

 
At 12:18 PM, September 08, 2004, Blogger Erinna said...

In my dreams, I am as clever as Esther. :)

 
At 12:37 PM, September 13, 2004, Blogger Esther Kustanowitz said...

Aw shucks, folks.

 

Post a Comment

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